Awake

Shake dreams from your hair

My pretty child, my sweet one

Choose the day and choose the sign of your day

The day’s divinity

(Jim Morrison)

You will all have to forgive me for writing what I am about to write. It will be a hard plate to digest, I am afraid, and I hope you can take it the right way.

It is a long and complicated story, though it is quite simple actually, once you see the whole picture. It is about piercing the instance and reason of fear, and unmasking the liar that makes us afraid of everything, and bow, bow, bow to a life of mediocrity forever more.

Actually, I am writing this in an attempt to make you free.

I am just scared that it may make you afraid.

And because you find fear reasonable, and you call your fears your rationality, you may even see me as the danger, as happens and I am more than certain has happened before.

Just remember, I am only trying to open your eyes and make you free.

It all starts with me waking up just an hour ago, and going through the knives section in the Shogun catalogue.

Shogun is a shop that sells arms: guns, knives, swords and the like. It is a shop located in the Netherlands, where people are more open-minded and policies are not so strict. Policies on guns and marihuana for instance.

I live just a little more to the south, in Belgium, and here policies are more conservative. So the guns don’t interest me, but the swords and knives do attract my attention.

I saw some beautiful knives, and I very much wanted to order and buy some of them, but I remember how I had a beautiful knife once, and my dad threw it away in a burst of disgust.

You see, we are not free. We are raised to be slaves, and every sign of power and a fighting spirit is punished and repressed.

It all begins in school. I remember when we had to stand in line before going back to the classroom after play time, we had to stand with our arms crossed in front of our chest and one finger obediently and exemplarily on our lips, as a sign that we were harmless and quiet little kids.

You have been raised to be so docile, to be so good, to be so obedient. You have been raised to be harmless.

And such a person, owning a big bowie knife, well, it just doesn’t fit the description. Or should I say the prescription?

A while ago, I was writing about the primal repression, the installment of the identity of guilt that the innocent soul goes through in the mirror stage, where the devil first tries to make a nest of darkness for it to thrive in in the heart of our souls of light.

At a very early age, and no one is to blame for this but the devil, we are told, from a voice in our head, that we are guilty and bad. And this war epoch, this stage of psychic development, is the basis for our later acts of attempting to redeem ourselves.

We are all sinners, we are all guilty, and for that, we have to pay for the rest of our lives. Paying penitence, suffering in an attempt to redeem our original and primal sin.

But be mindful! This is only a trick played by the devil, so we would bow, and do whatever this despicable instance in the beauty of our soul’s garden is trying to lure us into. And the tasks it layers up and draws out for us to execute are never what will make us attain happiness or liberation, or give us back our native peace with creation and our rightful part in it.

So this game, this act of the devil, convincing the innocent soul being that it is evil and bad and guilty, is what we find mirrored in the outside world.

There was a blog post I wrote some time ago, which was called ‘sympathy for the devil’, where I tried to say that some people, politicians, capitalists, people of the clergy, were taking on this role of the devil, incarnating him and playing exactly these tricks of guilt and redemption on their fellow human beings.

In this way, they gain a position that is smart, cunning, ingenious, as they put themselves in a strategic place out of the wind. They themselves are above and beyond any fault or accusation, they are immune and if you can call capitalism a religion these days, they are saints.

They tell us to pay, they tell us to work, they tell us that we are bad and we should suffer.

And they themselves laugh at our gullibility, and they reap the abundant fruits of us being so naïve and innocent, still, as to accept the accusations and believe them.

Yes, I am bad, yes, I am a sinner, yes, I bow, yes, I will work hard to pay off my debts.

Thank you for reminding me.

Thank you for telling me.

For otherwise…

I don’t know. Otherwise… we might be free beings, enjoying our lives in simple and innocent pleasures, without a care in the world and just enjoying the fruits of this beautiful garden we call our Mother and our Earth?

So it is officially, in the nomenclature of Lacanian psychoanalysis, perverse to be living without this basic feeling of guilt. Perversion is a personality structure that is precisely characterized by this, and the absence of the experience of basic shame and guilt, is enough to delineate a structure that is as important to differentiate as the other two basic structures, which are neurosis and psychosis.

I have tried to paint an evolutionary logic in between the three structures, showing how we can fight the terrors of the mind and overcome the basic attitude of guiltiness, freeing ourselves as beings of love and light, of innocence and gentleness, of not-knowing and just being.

So what I am trying to say and all, with my dad throwing away my very beloved bowie knife and my now being hesitant to replace it with a new one, is this.

Can we stand up for ourselves?

Can we reclaim our unbent spines and our unbroken backs?

For you see, it is a psychological thing. It is a thing of indoctrination and brainwashing.

People have been brainwashed to be docile, from the early schoolground play yard on. We have been taught to be docile, guilty and we have been reinforced in feeling bad and ashamed.

This is not questioned, this is not challenged, this is not healed in an attitude and distribution of love.

We are not told ‘you are ok, you are not so bad, you are not evil, you could be loved’.

No, we are told we are wrong, we are bad, we are sinners and the almighty God is already waiting with a whole lotta hell for us. Because, I don’t know, bad is all we are it seems, wrong is all we can be.

And what is wrong, in the final analysis?

Wrong is love, wrong is light, wrong is the soul, wrong is the divine, wrong is bliss, wrong is a feeling of gentleness, wrong is an act of kindness. Wrong is to forgive and wrong is to have faith in the ways of nature. Wrong is ecstasy and wrong is an act of unification when we turn out the lights at night and face each other expecting a joyful celebration.

All of this is wrong, all that is natural and divine is wrong.

All of this must be repressed.

The soul must be killed.

And we must serve the devil, serve the screaming and yelling boss in our head, whipping us like we were mules into going where he wants us to, serving him until the day we lay our heads down as we can give no more. Scourging us, until we break down and die. Never giving us rest, always asking for more, more, more. Faster, harder, no rest, no peace, no freedom or forgiveness.

And never will redemption come.

Never will we have worked off the guilt and paid off our debts.

There is always a new trick up his sleeve.

So as I said, we just should not buy the guilt. We should refuse the identity of being a sinner.

For we are not.

We are not guilty, we are not bad, we are not evil.

It is the voice that is telling us that, indoctrinating, brainwashing us, that is evil. It is the voice playing with our peace and love and innocence, that we should notice, that we should hear, that we should see, and that we should transcend.

It is the ego, the instance of fear and guilt and shame, that seduces us to bend our backs in endless painful labor, that laughs as we are crying, that celebrates as we are breaking down and down and down.

We weren’t born to suffer, we were born to celebrate.

And if I life a knife, a beautiful bowie knife, then maybe my dad is afraid I will stand up for myself one day.

This is the thing, the beautiful thing for the incarnations of the devil, that the people are brainwashed. The people really believe that they are evil. And if one of them tries to be a free man, the others will report him, the others will capture him and hand him over to the devil in its seat of authority.

Like they did to Jesus.

It is a beautiful thing I say, because the ones in their place of authority don’t have to keep the people down all the time and surveil the masses constantly for signs of dissidence and rebellion. No, the people keep themselves down. The people themselves will capture and report the ones trying to free themselves from this state of slavery and hypnosis. They themselves will betray anyone who is trying to free them, and trying to free himself or herself in order to be able to awaken his brothers and sisters.

The people themselves will keep each other down.

That is the beauty you see, the beauty of early indoctrination and raising the young and newborn in a constant process of a deep and blinding brainwash.

That they become so easy to handle.

Haha, it works like a charm.

It is so easy, it is like a car driving itself.

And all you have to do is sit back and drink your champagne.

Cheers leaders!

You know your psychology better than anyone else.